back: Sarah B, Cat, Jill, Dawn Marie, Sue; middle: Christine, Lupe, Lisa, Pamela, Sarah J; front: Cindy

Inspiring thoughts, ideas and information provided by women business owners.

The purpose of Keystone Women's Circle is to unite, support and promote women business owners. A keystone is the stone in an arch that binds all others in place. In a circle of stones, every stone is a keystone. We believe that together we can create a foundation, not of brick and mortar, but of relationships and mutual support, enabling all of us to prosper.

Monday, January 3, 2011

Why do people experience feelings differently?

Everyone is different and experiences things differently.  There are reasons for this.  When it comes to feelings there are several factors that come into play.

The first one is:  The nature and depth of wounding pain-  Not being invited to a dinner party of someone you met once would not hurt nearly as much as not being invited to a close friend's wedding.

The second one is: The persons general frame of mind - If you're an upbeat person who generally considers the glass half full, you will have an easier time than the glass is half empty type.

The third is: Your mindset - If you're convinced that you can't handle your pain and just know that you won't survive if you don't get that job, you're setting yourself up for misery. If on the other hand rejection doesn't bother you you'll be able to neutralize the sting much quicker.

Fourth is: If you're struggling with other hurts - If your best friend moves away a week after your house burns down and your dog is put to sleep, you might understandably feel overwhelmed.

Fifth is:  The persons ability to tolerate pain - A persons ability to tolerate both physical and emotional pain depends in a large part on the individuals biochemical makeup or brain chemistry.  Deficits in serotonin for example make you more prone towards depression and anxiety.

And lastly:  History of emotional wounding - If you've been the victim of severe abuse and /or neglect or have suffered other trauma, you will almost certainly be a good deal more sensitive to emotional wounding than other people (even if you don't realize it).

Everyone's pain is different, which makes it  hard to compare to anyone else's, and to not feel alone in our pain.  Remember that there is a reason for everything, and all your feelings are valid and a call to action.

Hope you all had a great New Year and have many blessing in 2011.

Sarah Bran de Leon

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